Tag Archive | thumb sucking

Been a difficult week..fear, regression, loneliness…

This week has been one of the hardest since the girls were taken from me.  Not only have I had to continue to deal with their loss but I have had to defend myself from false BPD assumptions and have been continuously arguing with my partner who I once thought was understanding.  I no longer feel safe anywhere, including in my own home, I am constantly checking the doors because I am scared someone will come in  and rape me.  When my bf yells at me I cower like a fool and I’ve reverted back to thumb sucking!! Something I haven’t done since I was about 15 or 16.  I used to feel safe with my bf but now even he is a threat.

 

My files from every therapist I have ever been to has been subpoenaed for court proceedings in the custody battle.  All those settings where confidentiality was stressed so that I could feel safe have now been violated.

 

I’m scared and feel so alone.  I can’t trust anyone around me.  They will all hurt me. I shared so much of my intimate life with my partner and he threatens that if we ever got bitter he would out me on alot of those things that I have shared with him.  A massive violation of my trust. :'(